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A ringtone is a very personal thing. Not only is it something that you want to hear, but it’s also a public statement about who you are. Most of the time, ringtones are heard by crowds of strangers, and let’s face it, they’ll judge you on what they hear.

With that in mind, we decided to list our favourite types of people based on the ringtones they have…

Stock-Standard Ringtone

Also known as the ‘I haven’t changed my ringtone since I got my phone’ person. This is the category that usually includes serious business people and your parents. Changing your ringtone is seen as a frivolous activity on par with gluing rhinestones and glitter to your phone case. After all, a phone is a tool to call people.

Annoying Fad Ringtone

Also known as the ‘Team Edward/Team Jacob/Team Justin Beiber’ person. The ringtone itself is epitomised by the ‘Crazy Frog’ ringtone of 2004. The person is usually somewhere between the ages of 12 and 15, female and won’t stop telling you how much they love Twilight and how High School Musical is, like, the best thing ever. Don’t worry; they’ll grow out of it.

How Cool Am I Ringtone

Also known as the ‘Haven’t you heard [insert obscure band name] before?’ person. These people will have the latest track that they just downloaded from thesixtyone from that band with that guy from that other band who the guys from the Mighty Boosh like. That is, they’ll have a song you’ve never heard of before because you aren’t hipster enough. They wear their ringtone as a musical badge of pride that they are superior to everyone else. They too will grow out of this at about the same time they grow out of their skinny jeans.

Ironic Ringtone

Closely related to the ‘Haven’t you heard [insert obscure band name] before?’ person, but generally slightly older/wiser. Instead of the hippest, latest indie track, these people generally opt for a more ironic statement sitting somewhere between Taylor Swift and What a Feeling from Flashdance. The idea is that when the ringtone plays (at maximum volume, of course), everyone hears it, laughs and then thinks more of the Ironic Ringtone man or lady. The men usually sport beards.

And for the record, we’re currently rocking ‘Eye of the Tiger’.

Every time the HD2 rings I feel like I’m in the middle of an 80s montage.

Have we missed any? Do you have a favourite ringtone psych profile? How did you choose yours? Tell us. We won’t judge you, we promise.